locura

I knew my innocence was lost 

when I realized I was no longer afraid 
of the darkness surrounding me. 
Instead I discovered,
 I fear the darkness that hides inside me

mirror, mirror on my wall

i want to be pretty, thin, and tall.

mirror, mirror if i change my hair,

maybe someone will start to care.

mirror, mirror if i starve myself,

at least i'll be beautiful, forget my health...

This series of images is an expression of a deeply personal and very emotional subject. 

Locura is spanish for madness. 

I chose it to represent the madness within my soul, the madness that is twisted and obsessed with how I look on the outside. 

I have always had no self esteem. With my appearance, my weight, my photography. 
It's a sickness that has plagued me since I was young. 
It's a constant struggle in my life, to try and overcome the monster in my head. 
Malissa has modelled for me a few times and also has become a close friend of mine. 

She suffers from a similar monster. 

I am so grateful to her for working with me on this incredibly intense and visceral project. 
I can't thank her enough for being the artistic embodiment of our monsters.

Model: Malissa Otting

haunted pt 2: lost

I didn't believe in ghosts or devils,

until I lost you, 
but continued to feel you...

haunted pt 1: love

Chilling whispers,

a love lost, never forgotten.

The lingering burn,

his fingertips on my skin.

Smouldering.

A hollow chest,

my heart is an echo.

I am haunted.

Its always such a lovely experience when you come across other artists who just "get" you. I've been lucky enough to find that in my hairdresser and mua Julija, we're always on the same wavelength, and this relationship allows us to bring out the best art in each other.

I was also fortunate enough to find this in a model I love working with, Sarah. We have the same energies and emotional vibes; absolutely perfect for shooting the emotive story driven art pieces I really love to create.

For my last shoot of the year I wanted just that, an emotive, personal art shoot. It is based on a poem I wrote about deep seeded heartbreak and that one intense love that haunts you no matter how much time as passed. 

I sent Sarah the poem and she instantly understood. I knew she would be able to translate my words into poses and expressions and help me make my poem into beautiful images.

Thank you to both Sarah and Julija for getting me and allowing me to create something wonderful.

xoxo
Part 2 in my next post 

Hair and make up: Julija Stojakovic for KOA Beauty and MOCA Studio
Model: S Nicole Ametrine

Vampire Academy

The school everyone is dying to get in to...

le beau ideal

denim on denim

I haven't been writing very much in the way of a blog entry for any of my recent shoots, so I figured I should fix that. 

This is the second time I've shot in a style similar to Terry Richardson and I'm really starting to like it a whole lot. It's very simplistic and a lot of fun. Just talking, being silly, listening to music,  and laughing is a great contrast to the higher stress level of a full production shoot.

This gorgeous girl has been a friend and model of mine for a good long time. I always love seeing her and catching up, and of course, taking some pictures. 

XOXO